Charles Clymer: An Open Letter to "A Voice for Men" (From a Man)

The idiocy and fear-mongering really speaks for itself.

Dear folks at "A Voice for Men",

I read your "Open Letter to Feminists" posted by Gordon Wadsworth in response to Lindy West's recent post to MRAs on Jezebel.

Full disclosure: I am a man and a proud feminist. I found Lindy West's article to be one of the best articulations on feminism (and MRAs) that I've ever seen.

If you're still reading, I applaud your willingness to hear what I have to say, but I should mention that there's no further applause for you in the rest of this letter. I'm going to be brutally honest.

I debated whether or not this letter would do any good. You folks run a website with rather asinine views. Am I doing any good by sending traffic your way? Am I potentially giving you a wider audience (and more recruits)?

My reasoning finally came down to this: I am seeing an alarming number of young men (and old men) gravitate towards your website. The men's rights subreddit on Reddit.com, alone, frequently has items from your site posted to their (subreddit) audience of 66,000 users.

I'm really hoping men see my post, and instead of being led to believe feminists are out to cut off their penises and force-feed it to them, will be enlightened to the blatant ridiculousness and hyperbole of your "brave" commentary.

And the shit you guys post is more than a little disconcerting, but let's stick to Mr. Wadsworth's letter.

And yes, I’m aware that your domesticated pet-feminist male sycophants agree with you, but thankfully they don’t speak for all men, even if it is comforting and convenient for you to believe otherwise.

This is the second paragraph of your letter, which I find absolutely hilarious. A website that calls itself "A Voice for Men" is dismissing all men who identify themselves as feminists.

In other words, my opinion is only valid if it supports your assertions. Otherwise, I should take my penis and go home, where my "bitch owner" has domesticated me, right?

Classy.

Whether men are even in a position of authority anymore is debatable...

Ha! Is that so? In the United States, alone, men control 80% of the Senate, 82% of the House, 2/3 of both the Supreme Court and the presidential cabinet, and have always sat behind the desk in the Oval Office.

The idea that men are on the downswing is laughable, and your proposal that this topic can even reasonably be debated does serious harm to your credibility. But let's continue...

Stated more generally, feminism hurts men. Most men in the manosphere have done this math and come to this conclusion. So trying to convince us that “patriarchy hurts men” just won’t cut it anymore.

As a man, I have never seen more egalitarian people than those involved in feminism. They have consistently and warmly welcomed my opinions and fought for men who are victims of gender roles. Further, those few women who do, in fact, hate men have been resoundingly shouted down by the vast majority of feminists as bigots.

And what the fuck is the "manosphere"? Is this a secret, underground bunker used by MRA superheroes with laminated "man cards"?

Men valuing themselves and wanting to avoid being cut out of the picture is seen as men rising up to oppress women “again.” Men speaking out about a man’s career being thrown in the trash can wasn’t merely men being angry about being cut out of their rightful half of the picture, it was a reflection of a misogynist culture trying to keep women out of tech. In other words, you see nothing but men attempting to assert their “authority” over women.

Yeah, again, I have never been cut out of a feminist conversation. Ever. No woman has ever told me I didn't have a place in a discussion on gender issues. In fact, the exact opposite has happened. Women have encouraged me to be part of the discussion, even if they disagree, so long as I gave my opinion in a respectful manner.

Actually, if there's any sort of problem here, it's that my opinion is TOO celebrated in feminist circles. If I give the same opinion as your average woman feminist, I'm far more likely to be given a bigger microphone, both because of how hard-wired gender roles are for everyone in our society and the fact that feminists crave men who see all this bullshit for what it is...

You treat males as disposable.

Again, no. I have never been treated with anything other than the utmost respect by the feminist community.

You make no boundary separating healthy female behavior from dysfunctional female behavior.

"Healthy Female Behavior" would be a kick-ass name for a punk-rock band. In your context, it sounds extremely condescending and quite hypocritical.

When you accuse men of being uniformly privileged based on your narrow view of male authority, it delegitimizes any and all discussion of male obligation. You give yourself permission to ignore and marginalize the male perspective, and subsequently to ignore men’s issues altogether.

But we are uniformly privileged. It's not our fault, but denying that men don't have an obvious advantage in society simply for possessing a penis is really a sterling example of self-denial. And claiming that we don't have an obligation to address this privilege is ridiculous.

As I have said, time and time, again: Not addressing one's own privilege is like refusing to help put a room on fire in your own building because it's not your room.

No one is blaming you for being born, Mr. Wadsworth, but failing to recognize the head start you've been given for having an XY chromosome is ridiculous, bordering on either extreme naivete or outright dishonesty.

This cycle of destruction needs to stop. We don’t need to be enemies, but you need to acknowledge male obligation to women and society as exactly one half of “patriarchal” oppression and start working harder to free men from it.

This is one of my favorite quotations out of your entire letter, the idea of being obligated to bear half the responsibility. I have seen feminists constantly speak out on the inequity men face in both court custody battles and infant circumcision, to name a few issues.

I have never--not once--seen MRAs, especially your own website, publish an article addressing the gender wage gap, the severe underrepresentation of women in every sphere of power, or even something as basic as sexual harassment.

Feminists, myself included, do have a primary focus on issues faced by women because that's where the bulk of sexism in our society is concentrated. And yet, we're still more than pulling our weight on men's issues, especially relative to the concern you've shown for women's issues.

Stop blaming women for your problems. You look pathetic and laughable.

And not for nothing, but you're really hurting your supposed "mission" by stuffing your fingers in your ears and refusing to listen to anyone who attempts to offer a different perspective.

I am a man, and you don't speak for me. And if I'm looking solely at issues that affect me and which route to take in order to effectively address them, I'm going to go with feminism over the Men's Rights Movement, every time.

Because they seem to have the intelligence, compassion, and--how to say it--maturity to look out for my welfare and that of everyone else, too.

Please, for the love of everyone's sake, shut down your site. You're not helping anyone, especially not men.

v/r

Charles Clymer


Source: Charles Clymer (blog)